Sometimes my POTS makes me SO mad!!!

Yesterday, I decided to clean out my pantry and go grocery shopping. This was something that hadn't been done in way too long, and not only was my pantry a mess but I was also running out of food. So, 2 hours and $200 later, I made it home. Hot, sweaty, and exhausted, I put my groceries away and crashed on the couch. I had planned to cook something wonderful, but no such luck, thanks to my prickly friend, POTS!

This morning when I woke up, it took everything I had to get out of bed. My head ached, my joints were screaming, and my body felt like it weighed a ton. I was so frustrated! Today was supposed to be a good day! Today was supposed to be a big day! I had an appointment to get my hair cut and highlighted, another something I haven't done in way too long. 

Now I don't know about y'all, but on days like today, I get mad. Mad at my POTS (for making me feel this way), mad at my body (for betraying me), mad at myself (for pushing too hard the day before), and mad at the world (just because I can). I had plans, but my POTS had other ideas. 

I knew with the way I was feeling, there was no way I could get dressed, drive into Houston, and sit in a salon chair for several hours. So, I cancelled my hair appointment and sat on my butt, pouting, for the remainder of the day. At least I was able to reschedule for next Friday, and I can guarantee you that I won't be grocery shopping or overdoing it in any way next Thursday. POTS made have ruined my day today, but I'm not giving up the fight to take back my pretty!

Step One - Gettin' My Hair Did

Please note...I am well aware that the title of this post is grammatically incorrect. But it makes me smile, so I'm going with it!

As I've mentioned before, my hair is falling out. This is a lovely side effect of one of the medications I take as well as my currently uncontrolled hypothyroidism. My solution to this issue has been a granny bun piled rather haphazardly on the top of my head. However, a few weeks ago, I hadn't had a chance to put my hair up yet, and a coworker said, "In the two years we've worked together, I don't think I've ever seen you with your hair down. Why in the world don't you show that red hair off?" Ouch!

This further reinforced the feeling that I had to do something about my pretty. I've always been told that my hair is one of my best features, and I've been hiding it for at least two years if not longer. Yes, to me it feels much thinner, but when your blessed with a head full of hair as thick as mine once was, others don't really notice that about half of it has fallen out! So, today, I made an appointment to get a haircut and highlights this Friday.

I'm excited but nervous at the same time. My hair is over midway down my back, and I haven't had highlights in I don't know how long. After a coloring mishap at Toni & Guy when I was in college, I've just let the sun do its thing and bring out my natural copper highlights. However, thanks to my increasingly debilitating heat intolerance, that is no longer an option.

So, with that decision made, the question now is, "To chop or not to chop?" I love drastic hair cuts, and at least three times in my life thus far, I've gone from hair almost to my waist to a pixie. But this time, I don't think I'm ready to be so bold. I'm thinking I'll have the stylist take off a few inches, add in a few layers, and pray my highlights turn out for the best.

If I can remember, I'll take a before and after pic to document my first step in this journey to take back my pretty.

POTS Made Cosmo!!!

In a recent issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine there was an article about POTS! I hope you've already seen the article, but if not, here's the link...Cosmo: I Have TWO Rare Diseases.

I have to say I was thrilled when I saw the article, as I never thought an article about POTS would be found anywhere other than a medical journal or website. I was so thrilled actually, that I shared this article with my three closest friends. One friend, always a total sweetheart, responded by saying that she was happy POTS had been written about in a popular women's magazine and that she would read the article when she had a chance. She followed up with a text message later that night after she read the article. Another friend, who is as much of a facebook junkie as I am, IMed me as she read the article, commenting as she went along. The third friend didn't respond at all. She didn't reply to my email, she didn't send me a text or give me a call, and she didn't even mention it the next time we talked. (And, yes, I know she received the email.) I honestly have to say I was truly surprised and rather hurt by her response or lack there of. It not only made me question her support of my chronic illness, but it also made me question our entire friendship. How could she not respond to something so important to me? I honestly do not know.

This made me wonder, how do other people's friends respond to their chronic illness. So, I'm asking you these questions, and I hope you'll answer honestly. How do your friends respond to your chronic illness? Are they supportive? Are they right there with you helping you through the rough days? Or do they pretend your chronic illness doesn't exist? I'd love to know how you feel and respond to your friends' support or lack of support. Do you let it impact your friendships, or do you just pretend it doesn't hurt, like we so often do with so many things when living with a chronic illness?

I look forward to your comments, and I hope you're having a symptom free day!